Tomorrow is my birthday. 28. This past Saturday I had plans with friends to go out for dinner and drinks to celebrate. I've been known to try to look my best when it's a special occasion. Ya know I'll schedule a hair appointment, maybe get my makeup done, wear a new outfit. I've also been known not to react well when it doesn't work out as I had planned.
Saturday morning things started to unravel. First my hairdresser called because she had to cancel my appointment. She had an emergency with her baby who apparently fell. (i think she dropped him). Ok fine. I can do my own hair. Then I go to look at another condo with my realtor. No closets. No parking. No go. Ok fine. I'm not going to be homeless until Sept. 1 - I still have some more time. Then I find out the boy is definitely going to pass on coming out and is going to stay in and recover from being sick and work on finals (so studious). I'm bummed. Ok fine. We will go out on my actual birthday. That's better anyway. Then I go to the mall because I wanted to wear the fake eyelashes that the MAC counter convinced me to buy for my tv interview. It completely intimidates me to try to adhere something to my eye with glue. So i thought they could do it and maybe put some makeup on me while they were at it.
I go up to the counter and the woman tells me that they have a policy that they can't put eyelashes on customers that were already worn. Excuse me? I don't think you know who you are dealing with. Not budging. Not an inch. Then she says that putting them on is really easy and just to "youtube it". I think at that point I wanted to lean over and strangle her.
Now in the grand scheme of things putting on fake eyelashes is pretty meaningless and I'm sure if I took the time I could figure out how to do it. However now I'm about to start the 28th year of my life and am continuing to try to figure it all out when it comes to matters of the heart, my career and taking that next huge step in life when I finally find that dream house.
Maybe I'll just have to youtube it.
Monday, May 18, 2009
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
La la la la la la tonight!
I had the most random night last night. ( I also decided to just use real names in this post because i don't have enough energy to come up with fake ones and this post is not incriminating in any way and "foxy" is my only friend who has a nickname as ridiculous as that)
Let’s just say I started at the Cadillac Lounge (strip club) with my trainer who has never been to a strip club and had enough ones to tip all the strippers in providence. I don’t know if it’s good or bad that:
1. I was asked if I was here for my shift when I walked in.
2. I knew one of the waitresses – Donna – who is also my psychic.
I then went to meet foxy white at twist (one of my favorite restaurants)– who never showed up. I was holding court at the bar and chatted with two men over the age of 60 and then another older gentleman who bought me a drink. (i have had several at this point because i was trying to keep myself occupied while waiting for her) Her sister, her friend Trevor and this other guy David all came in because she also told them to go there. So the four of us hung out. Then I run into my other friend Gunther who was having dinner with some friends. Gunther is like – you should ask David who is brother is. (they all know each other because providence is one incestuous town). So I finally did.
David Knight. You figure it out.
Ok if you still haven't figured it out as soon as I found out I started spelling out nkotb with my body to Gunther through the glass window where he was sitting with his friends. David was of course in the bathroom at the time.
Update: Even though we thought foxy had stood us up that evening we came to find out that unfortunately she had gotten into a car accident while texting. (hit a pole while she was probably texting me back). I may have sent her a couple text messages insinuating that she was not telling the truth when she said she was on her way. Turns out that she lost her cell phone during the whole debacle and I'm almost positive that my texts went through post accident. If that's not a Seinfeldesq ending I don't know what is.
Let’s just say I started at the Cadillac Lounge (strip club) with my trainer who has never been to a strip club and had enough ones to tip all the strippers in providence. I don’t know if it’s good or bad that:
1. I was asked if I was here for my shift when I walked in.
2. I knew one of the waitresses – Donna – who is also my psychic.
I then went to meet foxy white at twist (one of my favorite restaurants)– who never showed up. I was holding court at the bar and chatted with two men over the age of 60 and then another older gentleman who bought me a drink. (i have had several at this point because i was trying to keep myself occupied while waiting for her) Her sister, her friend Trevor and this other guy David all came in because she also told them to go there. So the four of us hung out. Then I run into my other friend Gunther who was having dinner with some friends. Gunther is like – you should ask David who is brother is. (they all know each other because providence is one incestuous town). So I finally did.
David Knight. You figure it out.
Ok if you still haven't figured it out as soon as I found out I started spelling out nkotb with my body to Gunther through the glass window where he was sitting with his friends. David was of course in the bathroom at the time.
Update: Even though we thought foxy had stood us up that evening we came to find out that unfortunately she had gotten into a car accident while texting. (hit a pole while she was probably texting me back). I may have sent her a couple text messages insinuating that she was not telling the truth when she said she was on her way. Turns out that she lost her cell phone during the whole debacle and I'm almost positive that my texts went through post accident. If that's not a Seinfeldesq ending I don't know what is.
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